Happy weekend everyone...

Dear Diary,

Wish you

and 

and

and

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight....

Happy weekend, my sweet friends.


Signed off for now
LOLA

p/s: advance post

Happy cheerful Friday.....

Dear Diary,

Here some funny poems to cheer up your day!

I wrote your name on sand, it got washed
I wrote your name in air, it was blown away
Then
I wrote your name in my heart and I got heart attack.

God saw me hungry, he created pizza
He saw me thirsty, he created Pepsi
He saw me in dark, he created light
He saw me without problems, he created you!

Twinkle twinkle little star
You should know what you are
And once you know what you are
Mental hospital is not so far

The rain makes all things beautiful
The grass and flowers too
If rain makes all things beautiful
Why doesn;t it rain on you?

Roses are red, violets are blue
Monkeys like you should be kept in zoo
Don't feel so angry you will find me there too
Not in cage but laughing at you.

When your life is in the darkness
Pray to God ask him to free you from darkness
And if after you pray and you are still in darkness,
Please pay your ELECTRICAL BILL!

Signed off for now
LOLA

Date night......

Dear Diary,

I reached the office slight late than usual.  This morning my stalker was taking his sweet time loitering in front of my house.  I'm so perplexed.  What does he really wants, really?  Why is he so obsessed with me?  

Nevertheless, the incident will not make me upset or annoyed, at least for today. As a matter of fact, nothing can put a damper on mood now.  Because, I have a dinner date with him tonight.  Yeahhhh for me!

So to BLY, this is for you:

I remember last night,

About our little fight,

It was just for a simple reason,

Nothing to do with faith or treason,

It was as to who loved more,

Me or you, and were so bored.

I was there cuddled in your arms,

Kissing every second on your palm.

You said that you loved me a lot,

But I just said, no you did not,

For I love you more,

Now don't get sore,

Sit up and look into my eyes,

You can see that, I wear no disguise,

For my is true,

And it only for you.....

Every tear that I shed,

As I cuddle close to you in the bed,

Is to say that dear you are my life and soul,

Just your gentle hug make me whole,

Please dear don't think of leaving me ever,

I will be able to smile, never.

Then I hold you really tight,

And just say the truth will all my might

That I love you,

And I will always, be there for you.....

~See you tonight ;)

And to everyone else, 
The only thing that will make you happy is being happy with who you are, and not who people think you are....'
Happy Thursday!

Signed off for now
LOLA

Aku yang tersakiti..................

Dear Diary,

Right now to I'm listening Judika "Aku yang tersakiti".  I always listen to that song whenever I feel down or sad.  I just can't sleep last night thinking about the decision I about to make, the decision that I have to make for the sake of us both.  

This morning I have finally made up my mind.  I have to wave my white flag to avoid further damage and withdraw from this relationship.  "Two is company, three is crowd", don't you think so?  

I believe I have not been lucky in love.  Yes, I have been blessed with some amazing moments with him, but somehow I found out that he didn't want what I wanted, he didn't feel what I felt, and most importantly is he didn't want to walk beside me into a future together.  He still stuck with his past life. 

Falling in love can be a slippery slope, no matter how many protective barriers we have built.  It can ease in like a light a mist that settles itself beautifully over your life, or it can blindside you.

Love is elastic. It can stretch and retract and change shape constantly.  One day you are over the moon, the next disillusioned. But remember elastic can break.  You can re-tie it, but there is now a knot.  Suddenly that perception is a little bit tainted. Sometimes we can recover from this, sometimes we just can't.

Loyalty and commitment teach us that we are not to walk away from people that we love.  Love without expectation.  But if your relationship is unbalanced and one of them is hurting, how much is enough? How many pieces are supposed to break and how damaged can we allow ourselves to get before we realise that this type of love isn't healthy?

Love and relationship require work and responsibility.  We have to learn when to stretch and when to break.  I feel happy but yet envious for those who have been blessed to find a romantic love that is equally shared.  Don't waste it!

Right now I felt the pain, and hope to recover from it.  I wish my heart to heal even though in a slow process.   There are things that I have learned about this relationship:

• If there is a feeling better than love, I have not felt it.
• Enjoy the good times together, be grateful of the memories because everything happens for a reason.
• Stay out of the future and in the moment.
• Protect both of our hearts, whether the love is still there or not.
• I'm broken, so beaten down and no energy left.  
• If the relationship starts to crumble, know when to put it down and let it be.
• Some things just won't work, no matter how badly I wish they would.  
• It is okay to walk away from something that hurts me. Because sometimes walking away is the only way to win.
• Not everyone, and not everything, is meant to stay.
• Sometimes you just need do your best and surrender the rest.
• What is right for me may be wrong for others, and vice versa.
• I am in control of one person; myself.
• Some people will refuse to accept you for who you are.
• Relationship can only exist on a steady foundation of truth.
• You can make decisions; or you can make excuses.

 "Love does not obey our expectations; it obeys our intentions".......

Signed off for now

LOLA

Thousand Apologies.......

Dear Diary,

Sorry that I love you, sorry that I care

Sorry that we've taken for granted the love that we share

Sorry for the heartache, sorry for the pain

Sorry for what you gave, if I didn't give back the same

Sorry for the waiting, sorry to waste your time

Sorry if I'm not worth it, you don't have to be mine

Sorry for mistaking something that I thought was true

Sorry if you don't understand why I do what I do

Sorry for my feelings if they are not enough

Sorry if we can't work through all this stuff

Sorry if you can't fit me into your life

Sorry if all I do is cause us to fight

Sorry if I'm cramping your life or getting in your way

Sorry if I don't say the things you want me to say

Sorry if I don't measure up to what you want me to be

Sorry if I can't be enough to make you just want me

Sorry for apologizing but I don't know what to do

Sorry if my dreams consist of me and you..... 

Signed off for now

LOLA

Just saying.........................

Dear Diary,

They said I'm easy to understand,
They said I'm a drama queen,
Coz I will laugh when I am happy,
I will cry when I am sad,
I will sulk when I am mad....

In reality,
Nobody understand me,
Sometimes I lied when I am mad,
Sometimes I cover my sadness with a smile,
Sometimes I pretend everything is fine when I feel hurt.....

Because I am a woman of few words....
Please read me between the lines,
Or try to look through my eyes,
Coz they are the window of my soul,
And it could never lies.......

Signed off for now
LOLA

Bad habits die hard.....

Dear Diary,

Everybody has his/her own habits, albeit good or bad.  I must confessed that  I have several  bad habits such as procrastination, overspending, but the worse is love to rummage people  belongings or secrets.  When I was young I loved to rummage my sisters belongings, searched for secrets that I can use against them.  Don't get me wrong! I love my sisters dearly and there is no way I would do any harm onto them.  I only use it on them for certain leverage like need to borrow their pretty awesome clothes, to join their outing/parties with friends, etc. 

Now, I am trying to refrain or at least minimize myself from doing it anymore. However, I still secretly rummage my children things like handphone or laptop for information.  Well, as a mother to two teenage sons, I believe it is my duty to ensure that they don't do something that will jeopardize their life or future.  

Other than that, I will only rummage for secrets when I feel vulnerable or threaten or even doubtful.  When I put my 100% confidence or trust to others, I expect them to do the same to me and will not by any chance betray my trust or confidence.  

I might love someone but it doesn't mean I trust the person until he has proved his innocent.  Besides, this is how I survive all these times, good and bad.  Because I will never tell him directly on how I feel, hence he has to read between the lines.  

Hence, my advice is if you are thinking putting other women's photos (especially with sexy pose) on your wallet or laptop and your other half finds out, please be prepared with a more concrete reason other that the pretext that he/she just someone that you vaguely knew or just a friend.  Come on! We are not in "Too Phat" era anymore.   And don't brush it off and pretend it never happen..... Have you ever heard "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned" before?

Then again, I'm just saying......

Signed off for now

LOLA